Boys Like You Don’t Stay Around Forever

Last night I sat outside your apartment sobbing in my car for 30 minutes starring at your window
My mouth tasted like blood and cigarettes and my tears felt like rocks rolling down my cheeks
I wanted you kiss me the way you did the first time on your balcony where the street lights felt like fire against my skin and I could feel the electricity in your veins
and when I told my sister about the way we fucked I think she knew how it was going to end
but she didn’t warn me, she just kept driving, sometimes I bring it up to her when we’re alone and she never looks me in the eye
but one time she told me “there’s lessons you’re gonna have to learn by yourself”
she warned me about boys like you, the way your lips would taste like God. I thought she was crazy until you kissed galaxies passed my tongue

Without You

I’m scared because I know
One day, when I’m waking up
In the morning, I’ll turn over
And see your face

I’ll think about how much
I am completely in
love with you

I’ll think about how
I never want to spend
A day without you

How I could never imagine
Myself apart from you

I’m scared because one
Day you are going to
Leave me

One day, I will be waking up
Alone, wondering how am
I going to get through my day
Without you

Hobby

I have this problem,
or kind of a hobby,
where I get drunk
and have sex with
people at parties

And when the night
begins I always feel
the same way about it
Like this is what I want

It’s not what I want at all
I always think that
I can make someone
fall in love with who
I am on the inside
By giving them
everything that I am
on the outside

But no one is never going
to love me at all
if I keep up this hobby

I Wonder About You

Seeing you and having
to ignore you without
saying hello
or how have you been
really hurts

Because at night when
I think about you
I can barely remember how
your voice sounds and
I honestly wonder how
you have been because
I miss your smell
and I miss your taste

I miss every little detail
about you, like your
cramped apartment
and the deck with a
not so lovely view

I even miss your roommate
that slept on your couch
because he was going
through a divorce
I miss him too

I wish I could stop by
sometime and visit you
I wonder if you think
about me ever
I wonder if I matter